scars

the other day, in the midst of shopping for a new pair of shoes. as i was looking in the mirror, for the first time, i realised exactly how ugly the surgical scars were on my legs. my left leg looks as if it was chopped up into 3 pieces and then roughly sewed together again, like that of a ragged doll. it doesn't look like it belonged to me anymore. and it doesn't even feel like mine.

suddenly, i seem to be waking up from a dream i've been having for the past 11 months. it suddenly dawned on me that life can never be the same again, and i can never go back to how it used to be.